I had the pleasure of bouncing around the T system here in town Saturday with some friends, and hit up the Arts Festival downtown Pittsburgh. On the way back, I get up to get off of the train, and hear a little girl ask “Mommy, is he a Pirate?” I had not heard the whole thing, but when I looked back in confusion, the mother assured me it was a compliment, such as I remind her of Johnny Depp. Hm, ok.
But what if I was a pirate? That would be intriguing. Well, I would have a ship, and call it the Flying Ger-man. My pirate name would be “Sorg the Sugar Pirate”, for we would be known for pirating of the sugarcane shipments(I think I have my trade route history right). Because dammit, I have a sweet tooth. I would have a crew of familiar faces.
My old friend Chachi would be first mate. And he would probably end up with a peg leg, because they didn’t have MRI’s back then. So his injury would have been deemed black magic and removed.
Will/emcee lb would be there. And he would have a parrot on his shoulder. Whenever he made a crack about someone, the parrot would say “Ding”, and somehow learned to give a thumbs up.
Kyle would be the over the top Pirate. He’d somehow be the cleanest of the crew. His hair would still be blonde. But the parrot would tend to try to steal his hair off of his head for his nest we was building in the crow’s nest. For no one realized “Peirre the Parrot” was a female parrot.
Mulango would be there as a Rastafarian-member of the crew. His laughter echoing beyond the seas.
Jeff/Big Daddy Shit would be the ships drunkard. And his strange, drunken rhyming of words into song to interesting beats would make him a hit in entertaining the crowd.
Yes, a pirate life for me. Now what if I was a ninja…Man, I wish I could be a ninja…