Today I went into the usual work day, ready to go (read half a sleep and not wanting to be there. Apparently I did my finest pretzel imitation wilts I was sleeping.) I came in to find my itunes library corrupt. Awesome start. So all of my podcasts were gone, feed-wise. I resubscribed to all I could think of, but alas, I know I’m missing quite a few. So I dove back into my music library and went back to some tried and true Twiztid. I haven’t listened to enough of “my music” in recent weeks. I don’t know what it is. Being busy. Not being the one driving the car most of the time. (leading to a lot of radio time. Ugh). I’ve been stressed. From lack of this music, and recent going-ons that have been driving me nuts the past few weeks.
I’ve had a history of the calming effects of music. And some think it to be odd that my healing agent of choice, stuff like Insane Clown Posse and Twiztid, would calm me so. It’s violent, and colorful, and loud. But that’s the point. All of that pent of aggression (of which I have a lot, apparently) gets out with this music. I finally gave ICP a chance after a break up in high school that had me pretty bad off. But the music helped. I took on these guys, and dove back into my faves in Nirvana, The Doors, and the like. I might have doubled my CD collection during the course of that year. And I went to my first ICP concert (preceded only by REO Speedwagon and Billy Ray Cyrus, of course) and my world was changed.
This was my first big concert. I’d seen maybe my friends playing their small gigs at the time. But the energy of the Nautica in Cleveland packed with fans, many in face paint and soaked with Faygo. And Biohazard with their giant circle pit. I was hooked. And have attended scores of shows since. I’m somewhere in the double digits of ICP/Twiztid shows. Including 5 Gatherings. Type O Negative, 4 or so Ozzfests, Flogging Molly, Kottonmouth Kings, Warped Tours, Green Day, Marylin Manson, and who knows who else.
And now I found another outlet in the production and performance of music. For all the shit I have to go through for some of these CRAP shows, it’s all worth it when I get on stage, get right into my zone, and deliver with a show. It’s that performance high, and the ability to outlet some of that aggression that just piles up from dealing with work, family, or whatever else has been pissing me off lately.
Back in the day, I recall getting together with my friends back home, and we would jam music and pretty much put on a kareoke session with each other. Music was bonding. We have videos of us in redicous glasses and hats and whatnot.
New feature, perhaps. I think on various blogs, I will pass along a photo or video from the past. there’s a couple in this post already, but why not, here’s another: